Judgement Day (Your Team Sucks!) Part 2: Straight Cash Homie and Toxic Traits

The number after each player name (in parenthesis) indicates that player’s exclusive Horns-n-Hops ranking at his position at the end of the 2024 season. It is not generated from some crappy generic website ranking.

Straight Cash Homie

2024 showed promise for GM Miller’s Straight Cash Homie squad. In 2023 he scored the second fewest overall points in the league. Last year, his total points improved to the 6th most in the league. That’s the good news. The bad news is he has yet to find the playoffs. But the great thing about fantasy football is there is always next year. Hope springs eternal!

QB: Patrick "F&#king" Mahomes (12)

Having Mahomes as your starting fantasy QB is never a bad thing. Technically, a 12th place QB barely makes him starting material, but he's Patrick F&#king Mahomes. His dip in stats certainly had to do with a bunch of pansy wide receivers who were hurt much or part of the season (Worthy, Rice, Brown, Smith-Schuster). And still the Chiefs made it to the Super Bowl?

Pat shows appreciation to his favorite people.

RB: Chase Brown (10),  "Uncle" Rico Dowdle (23), Javonte Williams (30), Tyler Allgeier (43), Jaylen Wright (93)

Brown had a breakout season, despite only rushing the ball 14 times in his first three games! The sky is the limit in his third season and it sounds like he will be a focal point for the Bengals this year. Dowdle looked great the last half of the 2024 season, putting together three consecutive 100 yard games. Then the Jones braintrust let him walk. He signed with the Panthers, which will probably be a step backwards in production as he shares the backfield now with Hubbard. Coincidently, the player the Cowboys signed to take Dowdle’s place also plays for Straight Cash Homie: Williams is only 25 years old, but it feels like he’s 52. Three years removed from a nasty knee injury, he’s got the opportunity to be the alpha again. He now shares the backfield with Miles Sanders, who has disappeared off the face of the football planet and rookie Jaydon Blue, who has been described as "lazy" in training camp. Williams is a fantasy dark horse this year. Allgeier has enormous value if (God forbid) something happens to Bijan Robinson while Wright is buried in a sloppy depth chart in Miami.

I know how to get rid of talent when I see it.

WR: Davante Adams (11), Wan’Dale Robinson (36), Khalil Shakir (37),  Jaylen Waddle (46), Xavier Leggette (60), Stefon “It’s Not Cocaine” Diggs (64), Rashee “Guilty Plea” Rice (100)

Kids, this is what “lots of potential” looks like. Adams leads this group and he could be in for a big year now that he’s in competent coaching hands. Robinson was overshadowed by Malik Nabers, but saw 140 targets last year and stayed healthy the entire year. Shakir isn’t going to dazzle anyone; he's basically another Wan'Dale Robinson, but with a great quarterback. Rice scored 64 fantasy points in his first three games, but went down to a season ending knee injury. But that's hardly his main problem in 2025. He’s certainly going to be suspended by the league due to off the field idiocy. If he can get his head screwed on straight, he could be a true fantasy superstar… Former first round pick Leggette did not live up to billing in 2024, but he also has a QB that sucks. Can he kick it up a notch or two in his second year? Another big question is can Diggs, who will turn 32 this fall, come back from a major knee injury? More importantly, can he keep his nose out of "a suspicious pink powder"? Stupid is as stupid does. Meanwhile, Waddle had a very disappointing 2024 campaign; it is frustrating because he's got unlimited potential. This group would give me anxiety.

Straight Cash Homie's wide receivers make him look like this on Sundays.

TE: George Kittle (3)

Kittle is as solid as they come, hauling in over 1,000 yards receiving last season. That’s the fourth time in eight season Kittle has topped the 1,000 yard mark and there’s no reason to think it can’t happen again this year. Not bad for a former fifth round draft pick.

Toxic Traits

GM Kampen secured the fourth overall playoff seed in 2023 and was coming off a 10 win season going into 2024. But last year went to hell in a handbasket and he failed to make the playoffs while chalking up just five wins. Rumor has it that Kampen recently put up a “Help Wanted” sign in front of Toxic Traits headquarters. Obviously he’s looking to get things back on track in 2025.

QB: Justin Herbert (11), CJ "Back to Earth" Stroud (18)

One of the reasons Toxic Traits fell back to earth is because Stroud fell back to earth with a classic sophomore slump. He went from throwing over 4,100 yards in 2023 to throwing for nearly 400 fewer yards and more than doubled his interceptions. He only had two 300-yard games last season, versus six in 2023. That's what happens when defensive coordinators have an off-season to figure you out. Herbert also had the second worst season of his five year career. The one highlight is Herbert only threw three interceptions in 504 attempts. That's an NFL best 0.6% interception percentage and that’s something, right? Ultimately, nothing clicked in Toxic Traits QB room last year. These two players are too good for that happen two years in a row.

CJ Stroud was disguised as Superman in 2023.

RB: Aaron Jones (15), Tyrone "Dick" Tracy (26), Brian "Bulletproof" Robinson (29), Jaylen Warren (39), Devin Singletary (47)

Jones put up consistent numbers last year and even though he’ll be 31 before the end of 2025; right now, he’s the alpha of this bunch. Tracy found his footing as rookie by Week 5 and was solid for the rest of the season. Unfortunately, the Giants added bowling ball Cam Skattebo in the fourth round of the NFL draft which really complicates the Giants backfield. Robinson has been in the league three seasons and has managed to not get shot for two of them. He consistently averages about 750 yards and five touchdowns a season… reliable, but not superstar material. Warren looked poised to take a lead back role after the 2023 season, but his production took a significant step backwards last year and there are a lot of mouths to feed in the Steelers backfield this season. Singletary had a 1,000 yards from scrimmage from ‘21 to ‘23, but he will be 28 by the start of this season and perhaps father time has caught up to him. Last season, he touched the ball six times or less in six different games and was inactive for two more. Those kinds of numbers get you cut from a fantasy roster.

WR: DeVonta Smith (27), Josh Downs (35), Adam "Skecher Slip-Ins" Thielen (52), Keon Coleman (71)

Smith missed four games last season, but still managed to place in the top 30 in WR scoring. He can be lethal downfield; in three games he averaged over 20 yards per reception. Downs had 107 targets last season, but the question is who will his QB be this year? I doubt he will never be a 1,200 yard receiving guy, but he's young and shows promise. Thielen will soon be 35, but he is Old Reliable, thanks to his outstanding work ethic. He missed seven games last year due to injury, but still ended up with 48 catches. He’s clearly near the end of his career, but don’t count him out just yet. Coleman was taken 33rd overall by the Bills last season and his first year as a pro was nothing spectacular although he showed a couple of flashes. He’s a decent prospect and has a fantastic quarterback throwing him the ball.

Thielen on a deep post route... with a little help.

TE: Isaiah Likely (16), TJ Hockenson (34)

Likely is playing second fiddle to Mark Andrews and that won’t change this year. However, when his number is called, Likely delivers. The latest news is he'll be out a few weeks after rolling his ankle at training camp. The focus here is Hockenson. He missed the first half of last season due to injury, but ended up with 41 catches and 455 yards. Double those numbers and you’ve got his potential production (he had 95 catches for 960 yards in 2023). He easily could be a Top 5 fantasy tight end this year.

Judgement Day: (Your Team Sucks!) Part 1: Blitz-n-Pass and The Mosaic Norsemen

Welcome to "Judgement Day: (Your Team Sucks!) The Commissioner’s League Overview and Analysis." This is just something fun I have put together for my fellow fantasy football guys before the third annual draft on August 7th. This is strictly tongue in cheek and absolutely nothing is to be taken personally (after all, my team sucks, too!).

I will go in this year's draft order, and post two teams at a time to make for simple reading. I also realize that some owners won’t read this series and that's okay. But those who do might learn a little about your competition (I have!) and you might find it interesting... maybe even a little entertaining.

The number after each player name (in parenthesis) indicates that player’s exclusive Horns-n-Hops ranking at his position at the end of the 2024 season. It is not generated from some crappy generic website ranking.

The first victims up are General Managers Kranitz and Budahn the Elder...

Blitz-n-Pass

Blitz-n-Pass has had a rough go the first two seasons, taking last place in 2023 and 2024. But you know what? This team has a great deal of potential. It feels like they are just a piece or two away from making a run at the playoffs.

QB: Joe Burrow (2), Brock Purdy (14)

Burrow completed the trifecta last year, leading the league in completions, passing yards and passing touchdowns. He also led in passing yards per game. He is, perhaps, the best fantasy QB going into 2025. * Purdy missed a couple of games last year and his numbers took a slight hit as the 49ers underwhelmed the league with injury after injury. He’s a solid QB2 and can be a QB1 with the right match-up.

RB: James Connor (11), Najee “Oh, My Eye!” Harris (20)

Blitz-n-Pass decided to keep only two running backs in the offseason. Connor recently turned 30 years old, but he put up the most rushing yards and the most yards from scrimmage in his entire career last season. Connor seems to be hitting his stride at 30, or has he hit his peak? * Meanwhile, Harris is a mystery. A “superficial” eye injury on July 4 has kept him off the field as of this writing. Sounds a bit more serious than superficial to me. Harris has never had less than 1,200 yards from scrimmage in his four year career, but he’s on a new team, in a new system and he’s got first rounder Omarion Hampton hot on his heels. He’s a vet, but missing reps in a new system isn’t good.

Najee Harris celebrates the Fourth a little differently.

WR: CeeDee Lamb (8), Marvin “Look at My Manly Biceps” Harrison, Jr (30), Darnell Mooney (31), Chris Godwin (53), Nick Westbrook-Ikhine (54), Amari Cooper (63)

Lamb clearly missed Dak Prescott last year: he caught almost 600 fewer passing yards and 6 fewer touchdowns than he did in 2023, but he was still a Top 8 WR in Horns-n-Hops. Lamb had the 7th most targets in the league last year and targets equal opportunity. He should dominate again this season, George Pickens be damned. * Harrison had very high expectations last season, but his 885 yards and 8 touchdowns were considered a disappointment to fantasy GMs. Clearly, Harrison has hit the weight room in the offseason (or he’s discovered performance enhancing drugs) and it’ll be interesting to see how he develops in year two; he could be poised for a breakout season. * Mooney nearly hit 1,000 yards receiving last year, his first with Atlanta, but that was with Kirk Cousins under center. Until Penix, Jr shows fantasy owners what he’s made of, Mooney could be a risky play. * Godwin missed 10 games in a forgettable, injury marred season. He’s starting camp on the PUP list. When healthy, he’s one of the best in the league, but the problem is he’s not getting any younger and no one knows when he’ll be healthy again. * Westbrook-Ikhine had the best season of his five year career this year, which included 9 touchdowns, but, unfortunately, he plays third fiddle to Tyreek Hill and Jaylen Waddle. * Cooper is going into the 11th season and is currently waiting for someone to get hurt in training camp a free agent.

PEDs. It's what's for breakfast!

TE: Cole Kmet (19), Dallas Goedert (27)

Kmet’s value took a major hit when Chicago took Colston Loveland in the first round in April. Best case scenario sees Kmet sharing TE duties, which is a kick in the nuts to Blitz-n-Pass, because... Goedert's career might be running on fumes. He ended the season last year on IR, missed seven games and is closing in on 31 years of age. Is he past his prime or will he find a second wind? We will find out.

The Mosaic Norsemen

GM Budahn the Elder has yet to sniff the playoffs in the league’s first two years. After coming in 8th place in the league in 2023 (narrowly missing the playoffs), he took a big step backward in 2024, placing 11th out of 12 teams. How can the Norsemen get it turned around?

QB: Bryce Young (20)

Budahn the Elder decided to keep one quarterback on his roster. The great news is Young was really good as an Oompa Loompa in the Wizard of Oz! He is exactly the same size as another Baby Yoda called Kyler Murray, but without the running skill. Young missed three games last year; he ended up passing for just 2,400 yards, which is what Joe Burrow usually throws in a quarter. Young has also never come close to a 300 yard game in his career as a pro. I probably don't need to explain that that kind of production will not win many fantasy football games. Carolina drafted a WR in the first round last year (Xavier Legette) and this year (Tet McMillan), so they are trying to give him weapons. But this is a glaring weakness for the Norsemen… no doubt this be will addressed at some point in the draft.

The multi-talented Bryce Young

RB: Devon Achane (5), Rachaad White (22), Tank Bigsby (36), Blake Corum (80), Jonathon Brooks (114)

Achane took the next step up last year from his rookie season. He can run and catch and is faster than a fat kid eating a cupcake. The best news is he stayed healthy all year in 2024 after missing five games the previous year.  He’s solidified himself as a full time RB1.. * White was supposed to in the upper echelon of RBs this year. He had a very promising 2023 (over 1,400 yards from scrimmage). But then the Bucs drafted a guy named Bucky Irving, and the backfield landscape in Tampa experienced a seismic shift. Irving is just too good for a running back by committee approach, so White is stuck in running back purgatory.

Rachaad White was done dirty by Tampa. Hellooooo Bucky!

However, Bigsby is the player to watch here. There is a changing of the guard in Jacksonville. Despite starting just one game in ‘24, Bigsby outrushed and outscored Travis Etienne. I look for this to be Bigsby’s breakout season. * Corum was a third round pick by the Rams last year, but touched the ball just 65 times; his value goes up significantly if Kyren Williams goes down. * Brooks has horrible luck. He is rehabbing his second torn ACL in as many years. He’s a promising young RB -- don’t forget, Vikings/Redskins RB Terry Allen tore his ACL twice and had a great career. 

WR: JaMarr Chase (1), Garrett Wilson (10), Jauan Jennings (24), Demario Douglas (47), Rome Odunze (49)

Chase had the 10th biggest season of any wide receiver in NFL history last year. He led the league in catches, yards and touchdowns. He said his goal is 2,000 receiving yards this season, which has never happened before. He’s the best in the league right now. * Wilson had the best season of his career last year despite being in an unwanted retarded red-headed stepchild situation with the Jets last year. He was Top 10 in Horns-n-Hops and things can only get better! * Jennings should be the top receiver in San Fran for at least the first part of the season… that is, if he ends up playing there. Will he hold the Niners hostage in a contract dispute? Will he get traded? * At 5’8” Douglas is even shorter than Bryce Young, but he did have 66 catches last year, which was his career high; however, he’s a WR4 at best.. * Odunze was the Bears’ 9th overall draft pick last year, but he didn’t set the league on fire; however, his average yards per reception was better than Mike Evans, Terry McLaurin and Jamar Chase. He’s got ridiculous potential, but it is a crowded WR room in Chicago.

TE: Juwan Johnson (17), Dalton Kincaid (30)

Johnson is an average tight end. He can be a starter if you’re desperate (and the Norsemen have been desperate). The real focus here is Kincaid, who missed four games due to a nagging knee injury last year and did not live up to his promising ‘23 rookie season. Look for him to have a big bounce back season now that he’s healthy again.

Next up: Straight Cash Homie and Toxic Traits.

Earhart Expedition and the Taraia Ojbect

 Most folks know I am a history enthusiast. Even as a boy I was interested in the past, so this next subject is "right up my alley," as my mom used to say.

The people at Purdue Research Foundation announced last week they are putting together a joint expedition with the Archaeological Legacy Institute on 5 November 2025, to confirm the findings of Amelia Earhart's plane, which disappeared somewhere in the South Pacific in July 1937. Many attempts have been made to locate the craft, but none have been successful.

Over the years, researchers have speculated that Earhart and her navigator, Fred Noonan, made an emergency landing on a deserted island called Nikomaroro. Within a lagoon on the island, there is an anomaly called the "Taraia Object," found by satellite, which could be Earhart's Lockheed Electra.

Well, I had to look for myself. So I fired up Google Earth and started searching for Nikomaroro Island. I admit I could not have found it on my own; it is truly a mere speck in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. It is about as isolated as you can get from any living creature on the planet.

Once I located the island, I started hunting for the Taraia Object (I had no visual references to follow because I am stubborn adventurous and I wanted to see if I could find it myself). The island is very small so the search did not take long. And yes, I quickly found something: off the northwestern shore of the island two circular objects and a roughly triangular shaped object with straight edges just 700 feet offshore.

I quickly noticed something just 700 feet off the northwestern shore.

An angle looking southeast. What is this? This debris (if I can call it that) is submerged in shallow water offshore.

Looking directly above, the object to the left does not look like a naturally occurring object. And what are the two round objects in the left-center and right-center? They look like manmade objects, don't they? If you look closely there is debris scattered all over.

Of course, I thought I found the Taraia Object, but I was wrong. Below is (or was) the Taraia Object:

The Taraia Object is the faint dark line in the direct center of the image, just offshore, above this spit of land. Older satellite imagery showed a tube like structure, which was thought to be an aircraft fuselage. However, other researchers say it is nothing more than an uprooted palm tree. No longer visible, researchers think it probably has been covered in silt.

What I did not know, until I looked deeper into this mystery, is the most common hypothesis is that Earhart and Noonan set up "Camp Zero" on the northwestern shore of the island and sent radio signals from the damaged aircraft, which is how investigators were able to eventually focus on Nikumaroro Island. The northwestern shore is where I found these anomalous objects!

The Taraia Object is at location B. The anomaly I found is in location A. North is at the top of the image.

The object I found and the location of the Taraia Object are some distance away from each other, but 88 years of tides, pounding waves, cyclones and storms could easily have carried debris all across this small island. If it is submerged, it is like finding a needle in a haystack.

At least 12 expeditions have explored Nikumaroro Island since 1989. Human bones have been found on the island, as well as a woman's shoe, a compact case and a jar of freckle cream, which Earhart was known to use. This seems to be strong evidence; however, researchers are still looking for her Lockheed Electra and no evidence of an aircraft has ever been found there. It is also possible the plane was carried out to sea and we will never find it.

Will this research team finally be able to solve this mystery? Furthermore, what did I find on the northwestern shore of the island? Is it parts of Earhart's plane? Maybe an old shipwreck? Perhaps we'll find out in November!

Rain Gauge Blues

 I started this site for a place to "jot down life stuff." I prefer to write about things interesting and extraordinary, but unfortunately I do not encounter much of that in my life. Most of it is mundane. 

Can mundane be interesting? Probably not. But that won't stop me from bragging about my new rain gauge.

A rain gauge is not a complicated instrument; at least it shouldn't be. But humans are really good at making very simple ideas into very convoluted concepts. As I posted on social media a few days ago, I started shopping for a new rain gauge because my old one wore itself out measuring all the water we got over the last week. As far as I can tell, I got between 0.5 and 6.5 inches of rain in my backyard since last Friday. I don't know for sure because I couldn't read the measurements on the glass tube anymore. 

I suspect all that UV exposure from all those sunny days when the rain gauge rendered itself useless really did a number on the thing.

After about 20 years of service, it was finally time to put the old boy out to pasture. Also, that mysterious crusty brown stuff at the bottom was probably radioactive.

So I set out to buy myself a new one -- something nice, but not too expensive. I searched Amazon because 1) I am too lazy to actually get in my car and go to a store and 2) I do not have to encounter other human beings while I shop at home. Hey, it's a win/win.

As I mentioned on social media, I found one that I really liked on Amazon, but I suspect AI attempted to pitch the product and I wasn't very impressed:

Not impressed at all. Too bad, because I liked this one.

So I kept looking. Eventually I found something that rang my bell. 

The one I chose said it was "freeze proof" but I call bullshit on that. When it gets below 32 degrees Fahrenheit, water is going to freeze, it doesn't matter if the water is inside the tube or outside the tube. Furthermore, water, in its frozen state, is going to expand inside the tube and the gauge is going to crack. Folks who choose not to believe in science can go ahead and leave their new rain gauge outside during a Minnesota winter and we'll see how it fairs.

But what really sold me on this particular product is the claim (I swear) that it was "Made in the USA." My parents taught me to always support American businesses when I can, so I did just that. 

So I was a little disappointed when this crap showed up:

Luckily, as an American citizen, I am used to being misled.

Disappointed as I was, I couldn't be bothered to send thing thing back. After all, it was shipped and delivered to my doorstep within 24 hours. So, I unpackaged the shiny new rain gauge -- which came with its own cute little stand -- and I have spent the afternoon sitting in my yard, drinking coffee and smoking a cigar, waiting for the rain to come and be measured.

If that's not mundane, I am not sure what is.

"She's a beaut, Clark."

Iran Chronicles, Chapter 1

On Saturday night, US leadership chose to get involved with the Israel/Iranian conflict by dropping six "bunker busting" bombs on Iranian nuclear facilities. No civilians were harmed in a pinpoint, surgical strike.

So Iran retaliated today by launching missiles at an isolated US military base in Qatar, far away from civilian population. They did not launch 60 missiles or 100 missiles. They launched six missiles, to equal the same number of US bombs dropped Saturday night. The missiles were easily intercepted and no one was hurt.

This is not difficult to understand. Iran is a Muslim nation and they had to save face; this is vitally important in Islamic culture. This missile "attack" was a symbolic gesture. It is clear Iran does not want to fight us. I am some moron sitting in my living room in Minnesota... if I know that, surely US leadership knows that too??

Then again, I am probably expecting far too much.

This entire conflict could be de-escalated right now. Iran's "retaliation" is the equivalent to a dog nipping at your heels and then rolling over in a gesture of submission. Now is the time to ask Iran if they are willing to negotiate peace with Israel.

Here's an idea: let's not hang on the precipice of a global conflict and go back to enjoying our summer, shall we?

Of course, that's not what will happen. People are going to die. And we all know it.

God Speed, Brian Wilson

God Speed, Brian Wilson.

The Beach Boys have always been part of the soundtrack of my life: playlists on my iPod, CD mixes or mix tapes (yeah, I am that old), the Beach Boys have been there. But I've been listening to their music way more than usual since the passing of Brian Wilson. After reading the outpouring of tributes from artists as diverse as Sting to Dolly Parton and all genres in-between, I've really gone through their catalogue and listened again, hearing many things for the first time -- and these are songs I have been listening to for 45+ years. 

A word always used when people talk about Brian Wilson is "genius." And that's exactly what he was. The music that Wilson channeled into notes was (and is) rivaled by very few. His music was complex, yet emotional. He certainly did not follow any rules of music theory, which is what made him unpredictably wonderful. 

The Beach Boys music (which is to say, Brian Wilson's music) was my first real obsession when I was growing up. That might surprise some people who know me, because the assumption is my first love was the Beatles. But I didn't really discover the Beatles until I was in college. 

I was exposed to the Beach Boys from a cassette in the house called Endless Summer which was a Beach Boys greatest hits compilation (Endless Summer was released in the summer of 1974, so I was at least five years old). I don't know whose tape it was or how it got there or even what Beach Boys were. I do remember the tape had a disturbing cover with some pedophile-looking types staring out of green ferns (I will never know how the Beach Boys signed off on that cover because it was not exactly flattering or pleasing to the eye). But, like they say, it's what's on the the inside that counts. 

Some homeless guys on the cover of a great album!

I loved the music on that cassette and my mother allowed it in the house because she loved the harmonies (plus my older brothers listened to the Beach Boys, so she was certainly familiar with the group). I remember playing that tape over and over and over again. Somehow, my young ears knew that these songs were not only impeccably written, but also very important to the music world. I don't know how I knew that, but I did.

Later, when I joined Columbia House Music Club (I think every kid my age had an account with Columbia House, and we all still owe them money), one of the first tapes I bought was Beach Boys Concert, which was recorded in 1964. 

Along with all their hits, the concert featured some great (and some delightfully oddball) cover songs like "Long Tall Texan," (by the Four Flickers), "Papa-Oom-Mow-Mow," (by the Rivingtons), "Let's Go Trippin," (by the inventor of surf music, Dick Dale), and the wonderful "Graduation Day" (by the Four Freshman). The album has fantastic energy and captures the band at their peak. I still listen to this album from time to time. It is a little rough around the edges, but I am okay with that; they clearly didn't doctor anything in post production. Live music isn't meant to be perfect. But those harmonies... man, they are perfect.

A terrific live album

It might be impossible to come up with a top ten list of my favorite Brian Wilson songs, but I will try. And one must keep in mind he wrote other hits not recorded by the Beach Boys ("Surf City" by Jan and Dean, for example). A top ten list will always leave something off that should be there, but here is my humble attempt, in no particular order:

• "'Til I Die" (from the album Surf's Up, 1971. An incredibly emotional and poignant song, even more so when one realizes that Wilson wrote this "when I was depressed and preoccupied with death." The lyrics are simple but haunting, with the end of each verse echoing unanswerable questions such as "How deep is the ocean?" and "How long will the wind blow?" Bandmate Bruce Johnston called this "Brian's heaviest song.")
• "The Warmth of the Sun" (from the album Shut Down Vol. 2, 1964. This was already my favorite Brian Wilson song when I learned, years later, that he wrote it on the evening of November 22, 1963. Wilson said he wrote the song in a half an hour as "a personal response" to the Kennedy assassination. Loss, grief, and ultimately, hope. To me, this is more than a song; it is a spiritual experience. Oddly, it was released as a B side to "Dance, Dance, Dance," in what could be the most bipolar 45 single release in music history!) 
• "In My Room" (from the album Surfer Girl, 1963. According the Wilson, the song was written in just one hour and it features the three Wilson brothers in perfect harmony. "We sounded just like we did in our bedroom all those nights" long before fame.)
• "Kiss Me, Baby" (from the album The Beach Boys Today!, 1965. Another of my personal all-time favorites. The verses are intentionally sparse, then the chorus explodes into so many complementary parts, it makes one's head swim. I've always loved the lyric, "Then I wondered as it got light/Were you still awake like me?") 
• "God Only Knows" (from the album Pet Sounds, 1966. Paul McCartney has famously said this is his favorite song ever written, which is high praise, indeed. Ironically, Wilson said he wrote the song after listening to the Beatles' Rubber Soul album for the first time: "It inspired me to do my own thing, so the next morning I went to the piano and wrote 'God Only Knows'." The song is listed number 11 of the "500 Greatest Songs of All Time," according to Rolling Stone magazine.)

If you don't think this is a masterpiece, you need to listen again.

• "Caroline, No" (from the album Pet Sounds, 1966. A beautiful song about the loss innocence. It was initially called "Carol, I Know," but Wilson changed the title to "Caroline, No" because it matched the song's mood of despair. This song closes the Pet Sounds album and is a complete 180 degree turn from the album's optimistic opener, "Wouldn't It Be Nice," a song that wishes "we were older." Now that innocence is gone. Another gorgeous two minute Brian Wilson masterpiece from an album universally regarded as a masterpiece. Fun fact: the percussion on this song is an empty water cooler jug played in an echo chamber. The Beatles weren't the only experimental ones in the '60s!) 
• "Wendy" (from the album All Summer Long, 1964. This song always appealed to me. I suppose it is just another "break up" song, but it is so beautiful, with that lone E minor in the chord progression ramming home the sadness of the protagonist. It was never released as a single, but the melody never left my brain after I heard it for the first time. Almost five decades later, it is still there!)
• "Don't Worry Baby" (from the album Shut Down Vol. 2, 1964. Wilson said this song was one of the Beach Boys "finest records." It was inspired by the Ronettes "Be My Baby," and Wilson said he even offered the song to the Ronettes, but producer Phil Spector -- a world class asshole -- rejected it because "Phil didn't write it." The genius of this song is the two separate voices, the man's [verse] and the woman's [chorus], and the song quietly modulates to a different key to represent the change in voice at each chorus. It was released as a B side to "I Get Around," which was the Beach Boys first number one hit. No word if Phil Spector regretted his decision.)
• "Girls on the Beach" (from the album All Summer Long, 1964. Title track of the film The Girls on the Beach. It is a hidden gem, not well known among casual fans. Definitely a cousin of "Surfer Girl," but a much more complex arrangement. Wilson called this his "last real surf-type song."
• "Hawaii" (from the album Surfer Girl, 1963. Never released as a single in the US, but this is another hidden gem that I've always loved. The repeating falsetto of the chorus is infectious. No matter how bad your day has been, "Hawaii" will put a smile on your face. A perfect little song in under two minutes.)

There are so many more songs I could talk about. This list could go on forever, just like the genius of Brian Wilson will continue to the end of days. We should all make such a mark in the world.

A Labor of Love

This year marks the 50th anniversary of a hobby my dad started when he was 60 years old, so it seemed appropriate to engage in this labor of love now to honor his years of impeccable work.

This task was an easy one to procrastinate, but the time had come to just do it. I've transferred my father's daily weather observations from their old, musty, three-ring binders to acid-free plastic sleeves and a brand new binder, to preserve them for many more years to come. 

I was only five years old when Dad took up this new hobby, so I don't have a lot of answers as to what inspired him to start.

I do know that he somehow came into possession of a WCCO Radio Weather Almanac 1975, but whether he ordered it from a radio or television ad or if it was given to him as a Christmas gift are questions probably lost to history.

This was the almanac that started my dad's new hobby from age 60 to the end of his life.

Knowing my dad, he read the almanac, looked at the "Weather Record Form" at the back of the book and decided this would be something fun to do. He started recording daily weather observations on January 1, 1975, using the form in the almanac. 

The first month of a 248 month journey.

He eventually modified his recordings and made his own forms from tablet paper for the next 20+ years. 

Dad's weather records are now safely protected in new plastic sheets.

The transferring process was tedious, but worth it. 176 separate pages! The folder in the upper half of the picture are the original records. They were in pretty rough shape.

I have very fond childhood memories of my dad sitting up every New Year's Eve, figuring out the year end averages and interesting facts like "days below zero" and "total inches of snow," as he compiled his year-long information. All of it was done by hand: no computers, no spreadsheets, no calculators, no fancy graphics. Just an ink pen, paper, colored pencils and a brilliant mind.  

His last daily weather observation was August 31, 1996. As the months went by in 1996, his handwriting became visibly weaker as his body was slowly consumed by cancer. He noted next to August 31st, the number "7914." 

After some thought, I realized this indicated the 7,914th straight day he had recorded his weather observations. I think it is profound that he took the time to note that fact. I also found it sad and, honestly, courageous. He knew it was time. 

He passed away just six months later.

I am hoping this story has a happy ending. I have Dad's records from the years 1975-1981 and 1989-1996. But I am completely missing his records from 1982 to 1988. I am also missing all of his "year end" reports. I know for a fact these exist and I have no doubt they are tucked away in a three-ringed binder somewhere, but everywhere I've searched, I've come up empty handed. 

However, I will continue looking until the day I die. Like my father, I am persistent and committed. I will never give up the search!

Choose Wisely

 Eighteen days ago I decided to free myself from the burden of all social media and what a difference it has made. (I should say almost all social media. I am still on Instagram to stay connected with some family.) But the rest of it -- Reddit, Threads, Twitter, and especially Facebook -- I've waived a middle finger and turned my back to the wind, as they say. I would recommend everyone to do the same.

Why did I do this? First, everything today is dominated by politics and I found myself going on social media daily (like almost everyone) and spending hours feeding into the paranoia, anxiety and outright anger of others. Even more pathetic is half the information on social media is false, but, incredibly, that doesn't even seem to matter!

Not only was I wasting hours doing absolutely nothing, but far worse than that, the time spent on those sites was weighing heavily on my mental health. I got to the point that it felt like the world really was ending. That's not how life should be lived.

If social media had a face...

So I pulled the plug.

Now I am finding myself a much happier person. Yes, I follow the news. And yes, I am among those that feel our country is in a very messed up place right now, but it cannot define my existence. 

Fast forward two and a half weeks: other than life's usual challenges, I am relaxing and reading Get Happy by Gerald Clarke, a biography of Grand Rapids' own Judy Garland. And my biggest stressors right now are my NCAA brackets and who to cut from my fantasy football dynasty team. That's the kind of stress I prefer.

Before I left social media, I remember someone, somewhere said, "How can people just go on living their lives like nothing is wrong?" That was the moment I knew I had to say adios to the screens and apps. Because what the hell am I supposed to do? Lock myself in a dark room and never come out? It seems that is what some people were suggesting.

Life is about choices. I've made mine.

^^^

On a related note, this weekend I have been enjoying watching the NCAA National Tournament... but even Instagram, my lone connection to social media, has more than its share of toxicity. 

McNeese State has a student manager named Amir Khan and he became a "social media sensation" early in the tournament after walking out with the team with a giant boombox around his neck. He even got a  nickname: "Aura." Khan is a 22 year-old sports management major from Lake Charles, Louisiana; just a typical college kid doing his job as student manager and having fun with his team; he is clearly beloved by the players. 

But the goons were out in force on Instagram. "He's an idiot" "WTF?" "A fat banana" were among the more kind comments. And it hit home AGAIN the reason why I left most social media. It is a fucking sewage tank full of pathetic souls who are miserable in the their own lives and it kills them to see anybody enjoying their own.

"Aura" Khan walking out with the team.

The fact is, these are young people enjoying the moment -- a once in a lifetime moment at that. I mean, Kahn was sitting next to Spike Lee on Saturday. How cool is that? Oh, and guess what? McNeese State defeated the heavily favored Clemson Tigers in the first round, which was their first NCAA tournament victory in school history. 

How dare anyone be happy for them? 

Life is about choices. Choose wisely.

No Social Media Experiment

 I had a revelation this morning while driving my son to school. I was surfing through channels on Sirius XM because they took away the mindless program I used to listen to in the morning, "Fantasy Football Morning." Fantasy football is a longtime hobby of mine and I enjoyed listening to fellow blockheads who shared that passion. Now it is gone.

[Whenever I find something that I really enjoy, the powers that be must find out about it and take it away, just to make me miserable: "Mike and Mike" on ESPN -- I watched that for years, then ESPN decided it was a good idea to get rid of it. Then Sirius XM launched a great channel a few years ago called "Volume," which was all music talk, all day. I listened to the channel morning, afternoon and night. I loved it. Then they took it away.]

Now they've taken away "Fantasy Football Morning," which I have enjoyed for several years. It sucks. One common theme to all these programs I enjoyed listening to? They never talked about politics. 

So, while desperately trying to find something to entertain me this morning (I settled on BBC World Service), I concluded that I cannot get away from politics anymore. And I cannot accept that. 

I know these are beyond turbulent times in the USA. We are a divided nation and I do not think that division will ever be repaired. I personally think the "great American experiment," as George Washington once eloquently described it, is sounding its death rattle. 

Politics and political talk consume everything, and seemingly, everyone. And it is ugly. 

Social media especially is a vicious, vacant black hole of political brimstone. Facebook. Reddit. Twitter. Threads. All are disgusting. Strangers insulting strangers. Threats being made. The hate in this country is palpable. I've finally reached the breaking point.

Which brings me back to my revelation today: I can control what I am exposed to. I don't need all this social media garbage! My god, what a refreshing thought! Constant exposure to negativity and anger and paranoia and outright hate wears on one's psyche. Not only is it unhealthy for the soul, it is a breeding ground for contempt, and ultimately, depression. I refuse to be pulled into the offal.

I am not sticking my head in the sand; I will continue to follow current events from proper, reliable sources (AP, Reuters, BBC -- yes, these are reliable sources; no, they do not report "fake news." Get a fucking brain cell). 

My plan of action:

I actually deleted my Twitter accounts more than a month ago, which was a good start. I knew I could control that. It's not much, but I felt good about doing it.

Reddit is gone. It is a fun place to explore, but it also has its share of angst. I'm too old for angst.

Facebook is worst of all and I only have an account because of my band; I need a personal account in order to have a business account. (Facebook used to be a fun, pleasant place to interact. It certainly isn't anymore, and I don't see it ever getting back to good). My solution to limit Facebook exposure was to download the Business Suite app which allowed me to remove the Facebook app from my devices. Again, it's not much, but I can control that.

I will keep Instagram only because my kids like to share videos and pictures with me from time to time. But the Threads app from Instagram is another dark, dark place to wander.

So I am going to try this experiment for a month (today is March 5) and see how I feel about... things. No social media other than Instagram. It will be difficult at first because social media triggers that "addictive" part of the brain. But if I could stop drinking alcohol for six weeks, I can easily do this.

It will also mean I will be reading books and writing a lot more, which is always a good thing. I think this is going to be a great, healthy change for me. I am excited to try it.

Random picture of the day: Portraits of wolves, taken at Dottie's Hometown Cafe in Grand Rapids, MN. Saturday morning, 1 March 2025.